Sunday, August 14, 2011

BUMPED-Exclusive: Obama calls Chris Matthews and Al Sharpton to secret WH meeting on how to deal with the Perry Problem











The Last Tradition has obtained a transcript of a top secret meeting between President Obama, Chris Matthews and Al Sharpton on how to handle Texas Gov Rick Perry entrance to the GOP run for president.



President Obama: God damn it, Chris! You told me Perry wasn’t going to run.



Chris Matthews: I tried to tell you Mr. President. But, you don’t answer your cell while you’re playing golf.



President Obama: Oh, so you think I play too much golf too?



Matthews: I didn’t say that Mr. President. My, that’s a very sharp crease you have in your pants, Mr. President.



Obama: What are you David Brooks now? Let’s focus Chris. What are we gonna do about Perry. This guy can kick my ass!



Al Sharpton: Mr. President?



Obama: Al? Don’t you see I’m talking to Chris right now?



Sharpton: Yeah, but….



Obama: Shut up, Al. I’ll get to you in a minute. What do we do, Chris?



Matthews: Let’s see, what can we do? Oh, I got it. I’ll call him crazy on my show.



Obama: Crazy huh?



Matthews: That’s it, Mr. President. I’ll call him crazy on my show, and Al can call him a racist on his show.



Obama: Hmm. Crazy and a racist?



Sharpton: But, Mr. Preesident?



Obama: Al? I’m still talking to Chris remember?



Matthews: I think that’s a winner Mr. President.



Obama: That sounds good, Chris. Maybe you can throw in some Confederate flag stuff. That always works on the Negros.



Sharpton: Negros? Mr. President! You’re black.



Obama: That’s for the campaign trail. I’m half white God dam it



Michelle Obama: It’s time for your 5th prayer of the day.



Obama: Oh, that’s right. Where’s my prayer rug?



Mrs. Obama: Where you always leave it, next to the statue of Mao Tse-tung.



Obama: Oh thanks, Honey. Okay that settles it. Chris, you get on MSNBC and call Perry crazy till the cows come home. And Al, call him a racist. That should be simple enough for you to understand because that’s all you do anyway.



Sharpton: Yes, Mr. President






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