Breaking: Obama went to Rio to have “flip flop” surgery to become John Kerry: Ghadafi can now stay in power

Sources tell The Last Tradition that President Barack Obama has undergone plastic surgery to become John Kerry.

“I can no longer live a lie!” Obama has told close friends. He wants to be fully white with a propensity to go wind surfing and change his mind on important issues of the day.

Evidence of Obama’s new transformation was made evident Tuesday when he said Muorimar Ghadafi can stay in power despite implementing a “no fly” zone over Libya at great expense to the American people.

When asked by reporters about the bombing of Libya and giving aide to rebel forces seeking to topple Ghadafi, Obama said, “Never mind.”